Please
by Jay'sWings
Summary: A one shot, about Luke's thoughts and questions pertaining to his destiny and his parentage as he goes to surrender to Vader on Endor, and the surprising meeting with his father that led Luke to turn himself in.


Disclaimer: I do not own any of this! Star Wars belongs to George Lucas, Lucasfilm, and all other rightful and respected owners! Enjoy!

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Please

It's hard to do this. To face you again.

I can't say that I've completely accepted that you're my father yet. Inside, my heart is still mending. Questions of doubt and denial form in my mind, even though I know what you told me on Bespin is the truth. If you're my father, why did you hurt me? Why did you let me fall to my death? However, then I am forced to ask myself questions. If I'm your son, your _son,_ why did I hate you so much in that moment you showed me the truth that I almost killed myself in denial?

Was it the fact that I loved you so much in that instant, that I couldn't stand myself? How could I love you, when you once killed all of those innocent people, including my adoptive parents, and Obi-wan? But the truth is, as the Force told me you were telling the truth and you _were_ my father, I began to feel an uncontrollable love growing for you. A love that I couldn't, and didn't want to, stop. I wonder if you felt that love, but you pushed it away, refusing to let it affect you in your attempt to persuade me to join your mission of evil. Was that the reason that I had to destroy myself, because I hated myself so much for loving the person I should have despised more than anything?

Was it the fact that you beat me in our duel that made me so distraught to throw myself off of that beam? I had trained for quite some time. I truly thought I was unbeatable; that my strength in the Force would save me in the end. And I guess, in some way, it did. But not when I was fighting you. You were just toying with me; allowing a small child to think himself a mighty warrior. And I did think myself strong, until you disarmed me, and told me the frightening truth of my heritage. Now a war rages inside me, between the love that formed in that instant you became my father and the hatred for who you are and what you have done to me. This never ending battle inside me almost makes me wish for another life. A life where I knew you. Where I looked up to you. At least then, I wouldn't have to constantly choose between what I should feel about you, and what I truly feel.

Do you fight this battle too? The Emperor must not really care about whether I join you or if I die. One way or another, he will remain in power. But do you feel something? Do you care? Or does the dark side shield you from loving your own son? I wouldn't be surprised if it did. What about Leia? Do you feel anything for her? Then again, how could you? She is being hidden from you, just like I was. Another secret, kept from you for the good of the universe. Doesn't it hurt, knowing that the whole galaxy is against you?

Well that's not entirely true. You've got your Empire. Your glorious Empire. Is that why you went to the Dark Side? Because you knew the power that you would obtain? Did you think I would fold so easily, like you did, when you offered me this power on Bespin? Or did you think that, knowing of my heritage, I would crumble and give up in despair? No, I wouldn't let the knowledge of my parentage change my view on something as important as my destiny. But I can't say that knowing you're my father hasn't weakened my resolve. Often I catch myself wondering what life would be like if I joined you; if I trained with you and followed in your footsteps. But then I think back to my friends, and I am caught between wanting to protect them and wanting to be with you.

It's a terrible thing you've done to me. You've forced me to make a choice; you or my friends? Light or darkness? And the thing that bothers me, which you will use against me when I confront you, is that I can't choose. So that leaves someone to choose for me. As I make my way closer and closer to you now, I can't help but realize that you could help me make that decision. After all, that's what fathers are supposed to do. You would turn me to the Dark Side to be your apprentice. Your heir. And in time, I would accept it. I would accept your choice as my own. Because you are my father, and I do love you, despite who you are trying to make me become.

Making my way through the brush of Endor, I look up to see a small Imperial Shuttle making its way out of the atmosphere. Something stirs inside me, and the calm of Endor seems broken for a moment. Using the Force, I try to sense if you are on the Shuttle, when suddenly your presence enters my mind.

_Luke._

I take a step back, halting in my slow tread toward the shield generator where I am planning to turn myself in. You _are_ here. In a few moments, I will be seeing you again. In a few moments, I will be shown to the darkness that almost claimed me on Bespin. Memories of that awful experience begin to resurface, forcing me to relive the nightmare.

_Luke, come to me. _

Taking another step backward, I seriously consider turning around and fleeing. Part of me is saying I'm not ready, while another part of me is excited, thrilled to finally see you again. I remember gripping the pole, looking up at you through battered eyes. Tired and weary, I listened as you turned my whole world upside down. And now you might just do it again. The conflicting emotions I'm feeling begin to spread doubt in me, and I'm not sure if I'm ready to face you.

_Luke, come to me, it is your destiny._

Your voice seems softer now, even if it is just a fraction kinder. Glancing backward, I sigh and continue to move forward through the trees, until I reach a small clearing that overlooks the roof of the shield generator. There, I see your shuttle landing. I see the small band of Imperial Troops get out and quickly make their way down below. Then you get off the shuttle. You turn around quickly and thrust your hand at the ship, then turn in my direction. A couple officers follow behind you, but they too disappear into the building. You remain though. And you are looking right at me.

Your hand moves, and suddenly, it is outstretched to me, just like before on Bespin. I stand on the clearing, my eyes locked on you. Now that I see you, I can't look away. Even though you are so far away, it seems as though I am right in front you, so close to your outstretched hand. Just like before. And just like the last time, my own hand longs to grasp yours. Suddenly the wind picks up behind me, and I am pushed out of the shadows of the forest and further into the clearing. Not moving, you continue to watch me, your hand outstretched, knowing that what happens next will change both of our lives forever. And neither one of us knows exactly how.

I hear people's voices now. Your men must have found me. Stealing a quick glance away from you, I see your troops making their way up the hill to where I am standing. It's now or never. Either run away back to my friends, or surrender and have your troops bring me to you. I look back at you; at your mask, at your hand remaining outstretched. Using the Force, I sense new emotions coming from you. Determination, focus, but also…desperation. Are you desperate to see me as I am to meet you? Do you love me, as I love you? The men are coming quickly now, but I could still escape. If I ran away, leaving you behind, I wouldn't be captured.

_Please._

My eyes widen as your thought enters into my mind. In that instant, my muscles freeze. You do love me. Which means you haven't turned to the Dark Side fully. The men now swarm around me, barking and telling me to put my hands up. I grudgingly comply. Soon I am in binders and they have taken my lightsaber. This last act causes me to flinch; no doubt you won't let me have that again. The troopers yell at me once more, and I am forced into a quick-paced march in the middle of them, as we make our way toward the shield generator. When I try to steal one last look at you, I find that your hand has returned to your side. For a moment, I wonder if I was mislead; if I imagined you saying that blessed word. But then you give a barely recognizable nod of your head, and victory blossoms out from you into the Force. Even though you hide your thoughts well, I know of the small hope that is coming out inside you; the dream you have that I have finally accepted my place beside you. The battle of emotions inside me continues to rage, and as I make my way closer to you, I cannot tell which side will win. It's hard to do this. To face you again.

But I have a feeling it's going to be worth it.

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This was actually the first Star Wars story I ever wrote, back when I was little! I know it's not much but I thought I had lost it and finding it again makes me happy, so I decided to post it! I hope you enjoy it, and if you would review then I would be very grateful, it would be wonderful just to see what you all think of my first Star Wars piece :)


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